Chase Spruiell, who writes and performs music as Big Loser. His newest EP Left on Delmar Drive, released by the Black Numbers in the spring of 2023, is an exercise in exorcism, of purging the negative to make room for the positive. “I knew I wanted to write an EP specifically about this relationship I went through,” Spruiell says. “She was certainly not the right partner for me and, deep down, I knew that. But I was so codependent that I would rather have been with her than be alone. Because of that, it ended up being a brutal relationship, and I endured a lot of passive-aggression, gaslighting, manipulation, and verbal abuse. Obviously, I fucked up too and was definitely not perfect, but the fog really clears when a relationship ends and you're able to see things for what they really are.” For Spruiell, Left of Delmar Drive was made out of necessity—to grow and heal, sure, but also survive. We caught up with Chaser of Big Loser to learn the roots of the project and what he's up to:
How did the band form and what does the band name mean?
In 2019, I transitioned my previous band Free Kittens & Bread into big loser. I was struggling with keeping 4 people together to be *the band* so I decided to change the name and configure the project into more of a solo thing, allowing band members to come and go as they please.
I chose big loser for a lot of reasons. To me, loss represents a depth of understanding in life that is essential to make oneself whole. On the surface, it's self-deprecating, which is funny in its own way, but I truly believe losing/failing is one of the most important ways to grow as a person. I see it as a positive thing, and a necessary one.
Previous musical projects? How'd you first get into music?
When I was in 9th grade, I bought a shitty Squier guitar at guitar center to learn to play for no particular reason, and I gave up within the month. It's a tale as old as time. It wasn't until my junior year of high school that I discovered the band Against Me! and hopped back into it. I started what was essentially an Against Me! cover band and we called ourselves Hazelwood, which was the street I lived on at the time. That was the only other band I'd been in before I started Free Kittens & Bread, which is now big loser.
First concert that you ever went to? Rooney!!! I went in 8th grade with my best friend Rico. It was at the Gypsy Tea Room in Dallas, TX. It was a life changing experience. They were touring with Straylight Run and Ozma. I'll never forget that concert.
What's your writing process like?
Like a passive beachcomber that never leaves the beach. I'm always searching for the next line, the next melody, the next pairing of chords that connect with me. Sometimes an entire song will come to me in the shower (chords, lyrics, melody, everything). Sometimes I'll work on a song every night until it's complete. Sometimes songs are not meant to be completed. That happens often, and it's always hard for me to accept.
With the band, I'll typically write the chords, melody, and lyrics on acoustic guitar, then beef it up with other musicians. it's hard to say. Each song and each record is written differently, but the foundation is always the same, which is a simple song on an acoustic guitar.
What other artists or songs inspire your music?
Lately, I've been inspired by longevity. The Mountain Goats and Eminem have already hit their "peaks." Most people think of these artists and say one of two things: "they're still around?" or “who is that?” to have already hit that peak and still find the inspiration to keep authentically creating is an underrated phenomenon in the music industry. Both of those artists released a new record in the past few years that are now my favorite records of theirs. I think only a true artist has that capability: to not be wrapped up in the result, but able to remain true to their artform. That's something I aim to maintain.
Some songs stay with me forever and will continue to hit me in the same way, no matter how much I listen to them. I heard the song "Left and Leaving" by the Weakerthans in 2001, when I was a wee lad. It was my favorite song then, and it's my favorite song now. I feel similarly about "Bird on the Wire" by Leonard Cohen, "In The Summer's When You Really Know" by Jets To Brazil, and "A Gentleman Caller" by Cursive. The fact that these artists made lasting pieces of art that overexposure can't kill is an impressive thing.
As a songwriter, lyrics have always been my strong suit. Spanish Love Songs, Red City Radio, The Smith Street Band, and Iron Chic are making music that I'm on board with right, and probably have the most influence on our sound.
What's the live experience like and your philosophy on playing live? Do you think the music live should be identical to the recorded version or should it be its own thing?
What an excellent question. that depends on the band and the music, in my opinion. Some recorded songs are incredibly difficult to recreate identically on stage, and some recorded songs are incredibly difficult to bring authenticity and life to on stage. I used to lean towards the live performance sounding exactly like the recordings, but that was because I wanted to sing along to everything, and if the lead singer wasn't singing exactly how they sang on the record, it would take me out of it, but that has changed for me.
Bob Dylan recorded all of his records live (there are a few exceptions). he believed in the art of performance. That's why there are a million bootlegs, b-sides, and miscellaneous recordings of the same songs. He recorded it differently every single time, in different keys, different tempos, different melodies. He left in mistakes. rarely, was it perfect. In a day and age where every minute detail of recording can be controlled and manipulated, what does it mean to be authentic? Is it only about the end product? Are performances and albums two completely different things done by the same artist? Being a musician/songwriter/band is strange: it falls somewhere between a Picasso painting and a Shakespeare play. a performance and a product. which means more? I'm not sure.
Has the band toured? What has the touring experience been, best shows?worst shows?
Big loser has toured a few times since 2019. I used to tour religiously when we were Free Kittens & Bread, though. Our longest was a nearly 2 month national tour. It was nuts. We were playing in West Virginia, and our lead guitarist jumped off his amp and tore his ACL. It was near the beginning of the tour. I booked the tour to where we had a show literally every night, so we could never get him to a doctor, and he was on crutches for the rest of the tour. It was brutal. It was a great show, but the consequences of it made it the worst show.
It's hard to pick the best show. We've opened for Jeff Rosenstock twice here in Austin, and they were both sold out shows. It was hard to beat that because I've always looked up to Jeff and his work ethic.
What's up next for the band?
Hopefully, we'll start recording again by the end of the year. I have songs for an entire record written, but I'll need to get the money together to get some studio time. we're currently looking for a bigger band to open for on tour, so fingers crossed that that happens this year. As you get older DIY touring wears you out, and I can still handle the physical demands of it, I just can't afford the financial wear and tear anymore.